3 Weeks To Go! Baby Rambles...

I have only a few weeks left before Rilan's due date! It's crazy to think how time has gone so fast in so many ways and in other ways it seems like an eternity I have been pregnant. My stomach is now very big....everyone asks when I am due, is this my first, am I having twins or they just look at my big belly........sometimes I like it when people ask me questions or don't mind it at least most of the time, once in awhile it iritates me now......I think I'm getting more and more hormonal though lately.....I have hot flashes and break down and cry for no reason wierd things like that! I can only sleep in a few positions well two and have a hard time not sleeping on my hands wich from the swelling and carpel tunnel are pretty much permanently numb now....I hope that goes away I just can't see getting surgery before having the baby so hopefully that doesn't bite me in the butt......I really am thankfull to be pregnant but I'm ready to have my body back and get it in better shape and meet this little one that keeps moving around in my stomach. It really is weird to me to think I have a baby in my stomach, it just doesn't seem really real that way yet I guess. I'm not too eager to go through labor though so when it is it is........I'm going to try and go without an epidural........I wonder if I'll even last 10 minutes but honestly the thought of a needle in my spine sounds less appealing to me then horrific cramps and I want to experience it as it is naturaly...yeah I know I may change my mind fast on all that.....all that really matters to me is that he gets here safely and healthy :).

pie time and other tid bits

So I haven't posted on this blog for months as Sarah pointed out....I'm mostly blogging to myself here I feel most of the time so I don't do it much but It's kindof fun to write tidbits here and there so I will have to get better. I didn't mean to download the nice swimsuit pic of me but I was critically analyzing the other horrible ones and downloaded this with the others on mistake it actually doesn't show well how fat and sassy I just realized I look in my sexy prego swimsuit (it just makes me look constipated).....I just love feeling fat as it's been a thorn in my side much of my life but you know what I have tried to eat healthy in a lot of ways and its just what it is so I will accept the things I cannot change and change the things I can when I can....I'm not going to stop living life or even swimming or even trying to eat be healthy just because the sight is not beutifull to behold and I'm not going to blame myself excessivly either it is what it is...people can think I eat bad all day and never exercise but thats not true so whatever. I'm probably the only one that cares too much anyways how I look but I need to just forgive myself for my imperfections too and do the best with what is and let others think negatively if they want and try and be nice and understanding anyhow......I don't know why it's so hard for many people women especially to just feel good about ourselves when we don't look act perfectly all the time....you know my body is producing a whole new life that seems healthy and I feel bad because of my weight or the fact that he's bigger then he should be and stuff like that that is so dumb the big things that matter seem great so I rock for bieng able to make a baby and even if I'm horrible and cry and complain and pout and sneer wich I'm going to try really hard not to do during delivery but even if I do I'm going to tell myself I rock If I make it through it.. I'm just going to plain tell myself I rock and I'm awesome more often!! Ok wow I really rambled and vented on that one............On to other things wich this post was meant to be about anyways :)...I finally am posting pics of Rilan's room wich I painted all by myself and the paint job turned out cute I think, I made the posters and decorations too, and put together the bassinet, yes I rock see I'm bieng positive about me....I'm not sure I love completly how the decorations are arranged truthfully, but it turned out pretty cute too and I love projects like that, most of the pics on the painting are on the family blog

Here's a really cute picture of Thain with his kids and their friends at the park, we've been doing a few little picnics at the park lately ( but that is turning into swimming and lagoon trips now I think ) the kids love to grab his hat or involve him in some fun play a lot, he can sure be a lot of fun for them.

I try not to make many treats as when I do I eat way too much as I make them or as they sit around but I do enjoy baking and don't do it enough anymore so I decided to bake more and ambitiously make a pie for after Sunday dinner, Sunday is the day I actually cook a meal or two, but anyhow it was a lemon Coconut or Macaroon pie and I had to improvise as I didn't have whipping cream just some whip cream so I put a little of that in and then ended up putting corn starch in it and cooking it over the stove instead of in the pie as I was afraid it wouldn't solidify at all without the whipping cream and the pie crust was already as brown as I wanted it, so it turned out too dense but the flavor is really good and I didn't use their crust recipee but my Mom's delicous one.....It is sure full of butter and sugar and all the things we all don't need too much of but anyone looking for a good splurgy dessert once in awhile I would recommend this recipee especially done the right way if it was fluffier I think it would have been perfect, taste wise anyways and I wasn't sure how I felt about lemon and coccunt together but flavor wise it worked well...:)